The enthusiasm and euphoria of having encountered a kindred spirit builds up such huge expectations that the physical meeting is invariably a let-down.
Be clear beforehand that you can’t meet for long – say, a maximum of 90 minutes.
Be warned: you tackle such emotionally sensitive issues this early on at your peril! A good phrase to use if you want to see him again is “shall we give each other a ring in a week or two” – this gives you “permission” to ring him if he’s a bit tardy following through.
You can’t take short cuts in the process of getting to know someone. For heaps of tips about how to create dating opportunities get a copy of my book: Smart Dating: how to find your man. You Tube.com/datingsuccess And for completely free and intelligent internet dating try this is a good option for Fab After Fifty women as older men more often opt for the internet whereas women will make a bee-line to the personal dating agencies to meet interviewed and ID checked guys who can be in short supply.
If you’ve been introduced through an introduction agency, a personal ad or on-line your first conversation may not be face to face but on the phone to arrange a time and venue.
Keep the call short, never more than five minutes and keep it light.
Trying too hard to get to know one another over the phone before you meet means that all your valuable small-talk, which you’ll badly need to break the ice on the date itself, will be used up. Wait until you meet because then you’ll be more spontaneous – with plenty of topics to talk about.
Whenever I hear that a couple’s first phone conversation lasted half the night (and this does happen), my heart sinks.
A first date is much too early to start talking about either your life goals or your emotional history. and then chatting and flirting in a relaxed manner. In which case, it’s time to part while you’ve still got lots more to discover about one another.A lottery with few winners – as I know from my own personal experience.Quite different to the old days when your family and community lost no time in getting you matched and hitched.If you don’t fix the duration before you meet then it will be difficult to cut it short during the date, without seeming rude, if he proves to be of no interest.Even if it’s going well, it’s still wise not to meet for long.